I’m forcing myself to write about something unrelated to the diss today, in part because, when I stop to think about it, working or thoughts of working have consumed this entire week. I can’t even remember the last time I left the house (right, thank you Twitter, it was Wednesday, and I went…to do some work at the library).

Naming a blog is a little like naming a dog (I was going to say child, but even I know that’s ludicrous). When you name a dog, you make a statement of self by which others are welcomed to judge you. For example, I don’t understand people who call their dogs by “people names.”

Doesn’t my pug just look like a Jason?

Nah, he kinda looks like a Captain Candyapple to me.

Because you are naming a dog, and not a child, you should take the opportunity to come up with something ass-upended and ridiculous. This is not the time for “Samantha” or “Katie.” Olde Tyme names can work, but only if accompanied by outlandish titles. Sir Reginald? Yes. Toby, Earl of Crapdom? Looks great on a tag.

My parents gave me a dog when I was five, and I named him Frisky because we got him in July and it was hot and all the dog wanted to do was hang out under the porch and stay cool. The dog was thus the exact opposite of friskiness, and so fell victim to my nascent skills of verbal irony. But long story short, Frisky eventually lived up to his name, was the best dog ever, and did I mention I really, like really for real what the hell is stopping me, want a dog? In November it will be eleven years since Frisky (who also answered to “get your ball!” and assorted whistles) died. I need to finish this fucking dissertation so I can get a job and a house and a yard and a Captain Candyapple. But we’re not talking about work today.

Naming a blog is hard, or at least it was hard for me. Because it’s a dissertation blog, I wanted to pick something somehow related to my work. “Our Lady of Perpetual Motion” was the first thing that popped into my head, in part because it references laws of physics, as does my intended project, and it part because it nods to the seemingly endless nature of academic work, and in part because it references the kind of open-ended supplications I’d make to any and all deities interested in helping me get through this project. But if you google that name, you’ll see it’s already in use by a couple of bands and various other crackpot organizations.

The very next thing that came to mind is the title I went with. “Perpetual Bread Crumbs” references the fact that my partner is messy, and I work from home, and my office basically shares space with the kitchen, so I feel like I’m constantly surrounded by the detritus of snacks. Add to this the fact that domestic chores are a major sticking point in the feminist household I’m (we’re) trying to run. How do you equally divide household duties between two people with entirely different standards of “messy”? The “Our Lady” then shoulders some religio-feminist irony–which is always fun, you know.

This wasn’t supposed to be about work, but it is, in the sense that the line between “work” and “life” no longer exists. Not only do I work at home, at least for the summer, and so function without any clear start and stop to my workday, but the particular brand of literary theory I practice doesn’t only apply to the work I do. Hence the tortured hours spent contemplating the time I choose to spend sweeping up crumbs.

Must.Stop.Thinking.And.Get.Dog.

Named.Parsippany .Curmudgeon.